Shiver

I have a long list of stupid bullshit.

Right now, I'm going to talk about the mental health ones. 
     I'm by no means a hypochondriac. I won't go to the doctor unless I'm literally dying, bleeding from my eyeballs, or shitting out my organs. One of the things that pisses me off the most is when people don't believe me about something because they can't see it. You can't see my kidneys, but I have. I KNOW they are covered in cysts. You can't see my depression, but I KNOW it's there. 

I have Seasonally Affected Depression, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Social Anxiety, and just general depression. It's not fun. My least favorite is probably the SAD. 
    PTSD I can usually deal with; I just don't watch certain movies and I'm learning to stand the bad word. The flashbacks are occurring less than they used to. I'm learning to better handle the fear. Social Anxiety takes some work, but I'm getting better at dealing with people outside of the safety of work and home. The other depression is the second-toughest...but writing sometimes helps. But there's nothing I can do about winter. I can't stop the rotation of the earth, and thus I can't control the fact that I get inexplicably depressed around this time of year. I hate it. It seems like a weakness to me. But--apart from drugging myself out of my mind or becoming a zombie/three-toed-sloth/turtle/crazy cat lady--there's nothing for it other than hanging on. 

I hope you do too. 

Hang on, 
    
Ness